On Air Episodes
Introverts vs. Extroverts, Enhancing Collaboration and Personal Growth
Transcript
Speaker 1:
Welcome to Auto Care On Air, a candid podcast for a curious industry. I'm Jackie Lutz, content Director at the Auto Care Association, and this is Carpool Conversations, where we collaborate on today's most relevant power skills. We are all headed in the same direction, so let's get there together. Today's topic is all about introverts and extroverts. I have with me my co-host, stacey Miller, vp of Communications at the Auto Care Association. Stacey and I really made a great pair for hosting this topic, because we are both a little bit more middle of the road when it comes to being introverted or extroverted. She definitely leans more on the introverted side and I lean more on the extroversion side. But since Stacey and I really have the middle of the road covered, I needed guests that were at the opposite ends of the spectrum. For a far on the extroverted spectrum, I immediately thought of my friend Matt Fowler, head of sales at Visual SKUs. He is also the current chair of the Auto Care Association's under 40 community called Yang. He is the poster child for extroversion, with little to no introversion in him. And for the far on the introverted spectrum person, I really didn't have to look very far either my dear friend Megan Moody, head of customers and strategy for ZF Aftermarket quickly came to my mind and I really learned a lot from this conversation.
Speaker 1:I always considered myself a pure extrovert, just loving social situations and being around people. I am a pretty open book and I connect very easily with others. But you'll find as we get going in this conversation, I found myself relating quite a bit to some of what the introverts say as well. So I really started questioning my extroversion and I think I might be more of an ambivert, but that's really great insight to have about myself. So I'm really hoping this does the same thing for you. You'll be getting four perspectives from all over the spectrum and I hope it helps you learn a little bit more about yourself and also how to work better with those around you. So thank you so much for being here. That's right, an introvert is a person oh, I hate this sentence. Yeah, an introvert is a person with qualities of a personality type known as introversion.
Speaker 2:Wow, no kidding, introverts are introverted.
Speaker 1:I told myself I wouldn't read that sentence. What a waste of breath. Can you imagine having to have?
Speaker 3:typed that.
Speaker 2:Fire them. The chat GPT right there. You're trying to get like 200 words in your document. You're like an introvert is someone who is in the world of the other introverts. That's kind of introverted.
Speaker 1:But which means that they feel more comfortable focusing on their inner thoughts and ideas rather than what's happening externally. They enjoy spending time with just one or two people rather than large groups or crowds.
Speaker 4:That last part hands down I agree with, but the first part is where I still struggle a bit.
Speaker 2:For me. What I hear with that is, like you mentioned earlier, friday afternoon you want to be laying in the hammock with a book, you know, and I'm like. The idea of sitting somewhere quietly with my thoughts is absolutely awful.
Speaker 1:I like it. I would love to do that Again. I have toddlers, so maybe I'm in a weird time of my life. I have toddlers, so maybe I'm in a weird time of my life.
Speaker 2:I have a puppy. It's basically the same, yeah.
Speaker 1:Well, I'm also a big reader, Like I don't mind my alone time and quiet.
Speaker 2:I don't spend any time in silence ever, Like that seems awful to me.
Speaker 4:Stacey, how do you interpret?
Speaker 3:it. I generally agree. Like I, as a self-proclaimed somewhat introvert, I do take more time with my own inner thoughts and ideas. Like I think about my mannerisms and my personality just in general, both in and out of the workplace. Like I am more likely to sit and deeply think on a project or a program. I am more likely to sit and thought without music or without distraction because I want to have the internal dialogue on something and I'm more likely to flesh out an idea by myself and take it from start to finish without necessarily asking others for feedback. So for me I interpret that maybe as some independence, like the introversion causes some independence, because you want to think and figure it out yourself. That to me is what the inner thoughts and ideas mean and what I interpret that as.
Speaker 1:So I see that part as true. I would agree with that because maybe on a more extroverted side, I love quiet time and fleshing out ideas and I love that deep thought time. I love it. It's when I'm most creative. But then I love the collaborative part next. So I want to flesh that idea out between a lot of different people and get a collaborative environment going and get more thoughts and opinions on it. And then by the time I'm done doing that, it's usually morphed into something that was not my original idea, but it's way better in my opinion. But yeah, I could totally see that, because I don't think I'd feel comfortable just going forward with just my thoughts. I don't trust that at all.
Speaker 3:Yeah. Do you think that people who elect to work remote, or really gung-ho about remote work, are inherently introverted or no?
Speaker 2:Because I'm not I'm like 50-50 about what I want to work from home, though I feel like I liked it in the beginning and then, after three years of it, I'm like I need to talk to somebody face to face, like there was a while that we're like.
Speaker 1:All of a sudden, you're like I haven't spoken to a human face to face in three days I couldn't agree more because, like I love the flexibility of working remote, I probably would have very, very little opportunities from where I live. And because I live so far out, I get up really early to get to an office at eight, like really early. So I get a lot of my time back, which is important, but after a week of just being by myself in my attic I am like dying for some social time.
Speaker 4:Yeah, and even as an introvert for me I am, and that goes to the spectrum comment of like where are you on introvert versus extrovert? Because for myself I hit a limit of working from home the definitions we looked at earlier because I actually go to the office sometimes in order to make sure, like to kind of like help myself get stuff done. I feed off of kind of that environment a little bit in order. But that's, I think, the creative side of me where I need a little bit of noise, of interaction in order to kind of get some of that stuff done. So I can't work from home 100%, I need to occasionally go and get the people interaction.
Speaker 3:I'm the same way. Even though I'm introverted once in a while, it's just a little too lonely. Yeah, I haven't seen anyone.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I don't even have the option to go to an office. Yeah, if I want to go to an office, it's a client's site.
Speaker 1:But do you travel a lot site, but do you travel a lot.
Speaker 2:I do travel a fair bit, but that's the only thing that saves. It is because, like, there's some times where you just want to like bounce ideas and it's not like I want to set up a team's meeting and I want to sit down and I want to do this. I want to like like when I had my old team, all of my one-on-ones were walking, so we would walk the entire office while we were chatting and like getting things done, because that was the way to kind of keep keep things moving. Cause I felt like sometimes if you're just sitting there staring either at a screen or even just in a conference room and you're just like I'm like okay, I need to move, like I need to go be with people, and that's just where you draw that energy, which that's the extrovert side, obviously.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Introverts are like no, I want to, in a quiet room, I'm like. Or what if we walked out on the studio floor full of 45 photographers? We talked instead.
Speaker 1:It might be why I network so hard when I'm at events, though, cause, like I, when I go to like connect or I go to apex I, I cram those days until late at night and I get up early. I get to the breakfast, but it's probably because I am cooped up in an attic most of my life and getting it all out of your system.
Speaker 4:Yeah, she sounds a little Harry Potter-ish there, like crammed under the boy under the cupboard.
Speaker 2:I was thinking of Flowers in the Attic. What was that movie?
Speaker 1:It sounds terrifying. I don't know what it is, but I don't need to sounds terrifying.
Speaker 2:I don't. I don't know what it is, but I don't need to. When I always think of it like introversion, extroversion. There are plenty of public speakers that were, I mean, steve jobs right, very much so an introvert, but the face of apple right. But when it comes to introversion, extroversion, I always look at it as like where do they recharge? Like, do they recharge alone in their own space or do they recharge in a big group? Like, where do they recharge? Like, do they recharge alone in their own space or do they recharge in a big group? Like having those conversations and like being out.
Speaker 2:Like for me, if I don't get out and go see people after a few days, I'm like dragging where. Some people are like, okay, I've seen people for too many days. I need. Like, when I come back from a conference, I'm pumped and ready to go and get things done. When you come back from a conference, you're like I, I think I'm going to sit in a box for a week digest everything that happened. And I'm like let's go get things done, which makes it hard sometimes. When you get back and you're like okay, I'm ready to go Because for me, I've just rebuilt all the energy and I'm ready to go crush it and you're like, I need to get my energy back.
Speaker 4:Yes, oh, my God.
Speaker 2:Recognizing those two things can be hard at work, because that's where you're going to instantly clash of like, no, I need a second to think about this, and the extrovert's like let's get going yeah.
Speaker 4:No, I think that's a perfect example.
Speaker 4:I mean, especially like you're in sales, matt. You come back from a conference and all you want to do is like jump on all the leads that you got, whereas I come back and even if I connected with a salesperson at a conference that, like I know I really need to go down that path, it's like don't dare contact me on that Monday after the conference because I need my days, like I'm someone that like, like I think it, you know the spectrum of what introversion to extroversion of. But your comment you may, matt, specifically about where do you get your energy to reboot? That to me, is helps define you towards one end or the other. And your comment of you get it from people and if you don't see people in three days, you've got to go get people to reboot me. If I travel all week or I'm in the office all week, friday night I am here, I'm on my couch, I'm reading a book, it's quiet, there is no noise, it's just. It's just me recharging. That sounds absolutely awful and it's perfect for me.
Speaker 2:I live in downtown chicago as a mother of toddlers.
Speaker 1:It sounds wonderful. Tell me everything, heaven tell me.
Speaker 4:Oh, let me tell you, because the best part is during the summer, where you can take that whole mode and go out in the hammock.
Speaker 3:So yeah, like a social recharge is important for introverts and you have a social meter that depletes every couple of minutes or every couple of hours, the more you're at one of those networking events and you know there's a point where you have to throw in the towel. Yeah, go back recharge, have some alone time and then come back so you can focus on it.
Speaker 4:Yeah, those networking events that you bring up is a good point, Because for me small talk.
Speaker 3:I can't, I can't jealous of people who can make good small talk small talk acquired.
Speaker 4:I need the value, I need the connection, Because if it's small talk like, I can last a lot longer when I'm having valuable conversations with people a lot longer. But you put me in a like, small talk, like oh, that was your day, what do you do? I'm dead in 30 minutes.
Speaker 2:Well, I mean, it's a skill to pull people out of small talk. Asking the right questions is something that it's a learned skill over time, for sure when it comes to networking right. Everyone starts with oh, it's sunny and it's like where do I go from there? Like sure is Good job, like I hope you put on your SPF, like there's nowhere to follow that up. But, like you said, if you're asking the right questions, you're like hey, what are you excited about today?
Speaker 4:Yeah.
Speaker 2:You know I forget who it was as a comedian, his favorite question to ask people is like what's the last thing you changed your mind down? I'm like, if someone asks you that, I'm like first, I'm like every morning there's something. I mean, my mind changes all the time. Um, but like that's part of introversion. Extroversion, that's part of just people being bad communicators.
Speaker 2:Um, but I always see at conferences you can kind of pick out the people who are more introverted, because those are the ones that are like I've got to go get some things done and they go back to their room for two hours and then they come back and they're ready to go and they're this, and then you've been out this whole time. Like I wish we didn't have to sit for part of this. Like we can, I can be talking, we're very valuable time of me talking and listening and all those things. Because like that's the other, I think common misconception is this like extroverts don't always have to be talking, they can be part of the conversation and listening, and that's still getting that bit, don't get me wrong, because many of us do tend to talk a lot, but we don't always say a lot I disagree with that.
Speaker 1:It's true. I think you have a lot of interesting things to say.
Speaker 2:Well, yeah.
Speaker 4:Not always. Okay, yeah, not always.
Speaker 2:There are some people who I mean, I've known introverts that feel the need.
Speaker 2:They're like well, for me to fit in, I have to be talking, so people will think that I'm approachable and da-da-da-da and it's like well, people can usually tell if it's forced to like, if it's not your natural state to be the center of the conversation unless you need to be like, don't feel like you have to be, um, and on the flip side, an extrovert being like my natural tendency is to be in the center of the room and I feel like, because I'm around introverts, I need to stand back and it's like well, sometimes just play with that medium a little bit and see where everybody else is, because some people might expect you to take that role up, because they know you well enough to know.
Speaker 2:Like you know, when Matt walks in, he's going to talk to everybody that's here and find out what's going on. I'm going to sit back for a minute, but if I come in thinking okay, I know there's a lot of introverts, I should probably turn that side of my brain on. And then everybody that was with me is like so what happened? And you're like oh, I was supposed to do that, like I thought I was blending in better by changing, and over time you realize that that usually doesn't work.
Speaker 1:What's the biggest struggle of an extrovert that's very far on the spectrum, like you?
Speaker 2:It's your feelings hurt a lot Because, like, if you think about it, right, so like if I wanted to have a conversation with megan, and she's like get out of my office. And it's not because she's mad at me, it's not because anything's wrong, and she's like I need to, I can't, I can't talk to you and get this done at the same time, where an extrovert's like typing with this hand and this hand while listening to a podcast and eating, and like that's just, we're moving, yeah, constantly moving but I will tell you and maybe this is not an introverted thing, but maybe it's just, you know, one piece of my personality but I will tell you that when I see people doing that like that little situation and I could even think about it when you and I were recently on a phone call, matt um, I'm making very often when I'm on phone calls I could.
Speaker 4:I could literally. He was doing like three things at once and I'm sitting here going okay, but did we actually have the conversation we needed to make? Did did all of that get absorbed?
Speaker 2:is how I'm how I look at it okay, great, got it. Next steps yeah, I talked to the rest of your team after that call and was like okay, we're gonna go and you're like, did he even hear a word? I said yes, which is. I mean, that's something that I naturally just need to work on, but like, but that's a piece of it is. Like in that scenario of like I walk up and she's like I need, sometimes you can internalize that and think what did I do wrong? Like am I too much, am I this, am I that? And so like. For people who are extremely extroverted, which sometimes I am, sometimes I'm not as much, but I'm always on that side of the fence.
Speaker 2:But yeah, you can't get your feelings hurt a little bit because you you internalize it of like, wait, they don't want me around, as opposed to they need their men taking a second to think, no, no, they just need to recharge. I'll talk to them in an hour. And it takes a while to pick that up. Of like, why are they saying no? Because sometimes, yeah, you are being annoying and you need to walk away, but sometimes they just need to recharge and has nothing to do with you. And sometimes I feel like extroverts can sometimes internalize things a lot when they're around introverts that are like give me my space, because the extrovert's not getting anything from having their own space.
Speaker 4:That internalization, jackie, you've talked about that before. What, how like you tend to internalize, or no? That was you. Oh, that's me. You tend to internalize things.
Speaker 3:I'll internalize that stuff. But that's why this is such an important point when it comes to communication in the workplace Knowing what type of communicator or personality other people are whether it's through predictive index or a disc or something like that to know this person's introverted, this person's extroverted, this person's a controller, this person's a collaborator. All'm always thinking about well, do I want an introvert or an extrovert? Subconsciously, right, like it's not in the job description. But don't we naturally gravitate to some extroverted people? They're easy to talk to, they're going to be great talking to clients or talking to members. And then we're sitting here and we're talking about introverts. And do I want to hire someone who needs to recharge and isn't going to be networking for four hours?
Speaker 3:And I looked up what were the skills that make introverts so valuable in the workplace and I thought they were actually really interesting, because I consider myself these, but I think other people misunderstand them.
Speaker 3:So what I found was introverts think more, so they take the time to process things a little bit longer, like if you're sitting in a meeting, you're information like less impulse yeah, okay, less impulses or they just take more time, they focus longer, which I think is definitely the case for some of us here at the table, like I need time like that, focus time to think where the door is closed and no one's popping in, nobody's I am me, so I could have those deep thought exercises. They're often gifted in a specific field, so we should talk about that. Do any of us feel like they're really gifted in something? And then they do the right thing under pressure? Apparently, introverts do the right thing under pressure. So instead of doing the thing that everybody expects them to do it might not be the right thing or the popular decision They'll do the right thing because they think more and they focus longer to make those decisions. So that seems like a really big benefit for employers or people who are seeking out others to work with. Introversion is not a bad thing.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'd like to hear those for an extrovert because I don't not relate to those. But you know, I could see. I mean, obviously all of those are probably a spectrum too, but at my previous job, in my previous role, I didn't have a lot of deep thought time. In my current role I do, and it helps a lot and it helps me focus. But it was like the last one you said.
Speaker 3:They do the right thing under pressure. I love that.
Speaker 4:So yeah, and it was your comment that you made when you said that the do the right thing under pressure may not always be the popular opinion it made me think about tendencies of like people pleasing Right, exactly no, but that's what it made me think of because, like, going to the social aspect of extroverts, like it's always like you're this, you want to be part of the group, you want to like like you even said, matt, you're trying to find ways to like, kind of even blend in, depending on the crowd, and it's like I don't like, like you said, do the right thing, like I don't care if someone's going to like it or not, like I'm just going to do what's right.
Speaker 1:I think you're completely right. I think I mentioned before. I know that they don't completely interlink, but I think people pleasing comes a little bit with extroversion in a way, because I think in a way we tie like Matt and I we'll tie our value a little bit to our social lives, right, a lot of it, and so you want to be accepted innately. But you know, I don't think that they're completely linked. But I think people pleasing is a slippery slope and I, you know, as an extrovert and as a recovering people pleaser, I can see a link there.
Speaker 2:I really can no-transcript to make sure that people are going to receive it, and maybe that's just an internal thing. That's something that I would think that extroverts would be more aware of, because you're more aware of how other people are reacting.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I would agree with that. So what's the biggest challenge of being an introvert? We heard the biggest challenge for an extrovert it was getting your feelings heard, which is so sad, Matt.
Speaker 2:The idea of a sad man. Don't get me wrong. It's like not wildly dramatic.
Speaker 1:Do you just like cry?
Speaker 2:I just sit at home when I'm not recharging, with my puppy and I'm like Romeo, I'm going to need you to hear me out. I mean, I think it's not that dramatic, but that's something. That's something to be cognizant of, as in like, if you're an introvert trying to figure out, you know, what could I do in my world? To like be more cognizant of what an extrovert goes through is like, hey, you know, being careful about how you deliver things, because they can internalize things too, even though they're always the bubbly one and they're always outgoing and they're always like if they can understand where you're coming from right, it's a good place.
Speaker 2:Make sure that you're not just all the time like get away from me yeah.
Speaker 4:Toughest thing of an introvert Gosh, that's a really tough question. I don't know, stace, does anything come to you immediately? Do you guys have?
Speaker 1:weaknesses, oh yeah, we don't admit them.
Speaker 3:Are you kidding me?
Speaker 4:Mine was not a weakness and I've perfected it no, you know what it, and maybe this is getting a little raw, I don't know, but I really think introverts because we don't like kind of the you were, you were saying like you kind of feed off of people, you can read emotions necessarily a little bit better, you can kind of twist things a bit better, whereas I see introverts are a little bit more straight and narrow and that sometimes can come off rather blunt.
Speaker 4:Yeah, yep, um, and even though we don't mean it that way, and I think that you know, when people use a lot more data, a lot more facts, a lot more like this is how it is, instead of like softening the conversation, um, I I think that that's kind of the. Probably the toughest thing about introverts is that you don't mean to be blunt, you don mean it's just that your natural tendency is. You've already thought it through, you've had the deep thinking session. Now here it is, here it is. It's just it's black and white. It's black and white, like and I don't need to like massage the edges and I think that maybe that's probably the toughest thing is you don't want to be seen that way. You're not intending to be seen that way. People have a perception of you, but people have a perception and we massage the edges a lot less than extroverts do.
Speaker 3:I agree with that. I think my biggest challenge and I thought about it as you two were talking was the perception of being an introvert. Like admitting that you're an introvert is really weird for some reason in the workplace, probably because of the roles that we're in, but for some reason I guess my perception was that revealing that I am some sort of an introvert is a weakness, or could be perceived as some sort of weakness, and so that's like a really irrational fear. But when you sit and you talk about each, each personality introvert, extrovert, somewhere in between has its pros and cons. It's just a different way of working. Like going through this here today has helped me a lot because I thought, man, my introversion is something I really need to work on and I need to be less introverted. But maybe I need to be more understanding of how I work and be open with people about how I work so they can work better with me.
Speaker 1:Yeah, because I think that there's so many strengths that come with introverts, Like I don't think there's a negative connotation when I hear somebody admit that they're an introvert, even if they're in an extroverted role. I kind of think it's very interesting and it just gives like that little bit of diversity that I think companies kind of look for. Right, you don't want all extroverts being communicators in your company. Could you imagine 100 matt?
Speaker 4:fowlers oh there is a paradise it's funny you said that though, jenny that, because even myself, as an introvert, when I hear someone else say that they're an introvert, I naturally in my head go oh like, like, like, poor thing.
Speaker 3:Oh, you know, this is why I don't tell people things.
Speaker 4:Like because maybe it's because I know that it's tough, but I I immediately have like a perception in my head when someone tells me that they're an introvert, even though I'm an introvert. Okay, well, riddle me this.
Speaker 1:Okay, I'm ready. Like you and I became friends several years ago, 2015. And I would say, I would argue that you chose me Because I thought you didn't like me.
Speaker 2:Did you walk?
Speaker 1:up and give her a rose. You're it.
Speaker 4:You're my extrovert. You're my safe space Because I thought you didn't like me that's a very common thing and, seen with introverts, yes and then like, but you kind of like kept coming around and I'm like, okay, maybe she doesn't hate me.
Speaker 1:And then I'm like, actually, she kind of likes me. Okay, we're cool, we're cool, we're cool. So I feel like, so why do you choose certain extroverts? I'm just, is that a thing?
Speaker 4:I, he, I will. I mean, why do you choose anybody Like? Why did you choose Rick to marry him? You know it's like he's an introvert.
Speaker 2:I've only ever dated introverts. I've never dated an extrovert.
Speaker 4:Okay, maybe it's like a pairing in regards to like yeah, I mean, maybe that's something Like I'm just thinking, even like my personal life Like, yeah, extrovert is who I go with.
Speaker 3:But why did I choose you? Um well, not like me, not like me personally, but well, introverts need more trust?
Speaker 4:apparently I do. I have to trust the person. So I don't think it's like I seek out extroverts by any means, because definitely some extroverts drain my battery um real quick. I mean matt, until I got to know you better, you drained my battery like five minutes I recall yeah.
Speaker 4:So that that's for me at least. I I think it just. I think we need balance, you know, and we, like you said, we all sit in this range, but I think you gotta have a little bit of balance otherwise a bunch of introverts in a room.
Speaker 1:Have you guys seen that video of all the dogs, or they're like they brought all the introverted dogs together to a dog park and like they were all just sitting there and no one was playing. Like none of the dogs were playing with each other what is an introverted dog?
Speaker 1:what breed? They just don't like other dogs. I don't know, it was all kinds of brains, but they're just like hey, if you have an introverted dog, bring them to the dog park. They were going to try to kind of get the dogs to play together and none of them played together, so it was just like.
Speaker 4:Well, I would say, jackie and matt are the farthest thing from an introverted dog like.
Speaker 2:That is something I think that can get overlooked too is sometimes being an extrovert. It's not even about being the center and being talking. Also, it's the mere fact of being around people. Even if you're not actually talking and doing those things, you're still around people, like. I agree, the thought of being alone is like and your fomo.
Speaker 4:Oh, you're missing out.
Speaker 2:I suffer daily every single day it's a real disease I miss out on very little, but I sleep very little, hence the the gallon of energy drink that I'm drinking yeah, and I don't care.
Speaker 1:I will gladly listen to somebody's story I've always envied you that way and you stacy, like you guys all you guys are okay with missing out on some things you know back I'm happy to hear it.
Speaker 3:Yeah, because you know, you just know what's best for you and you're like well, am I really gonna feel great after I know network for an additional two hours at the end of this really long day, or if I go on this work trip or if I do this thing, if you overextend yourself, you kind of know when you need to take a step back and throw the towel in extending to Matt and I.
Speaker 1:It's like let's fill our batteries.
Speaker 3:Let's get it going yeah, you have a bucket to fill, a big bucket to fill, but those are like very good takeaways Again for employers. It's like if you identify people who are extroverts, you know those are the people who are going to want to go above and beyond and take the opportunities. It's not that introverts won't, but they just do it in a different way, a different style, and they have to break those things up into more manageable pieces in order for them to be effective.
Speaker 4:And I think that's a good point, that it's not that they don't want to. I think sometimes, in order to get them started, you almost you need to bring it to them, whereas extroverts may more likely come to you and say, hey, I saw this, can I go to this, can I do, can I do this whereas introverts you as a manager or, you know, as a colleague, anything, um, you may need to recommend it to them and say, look like this may be something that you'll find value in, that you can, you know, learn at, or something like that, where, yeah, versus asking to just you know, extroverts are seeking and introverts are more comfortable with receiving.
Speaker 3:Maybe.
Speaker 2:And that just again it keeps circling back for me of, like you know, sometimes it's, it seems obvious, about introverts, extroverts, all that stuff, but at the end of the day you don't. Until you talk to people and get to know them, you don't really know how their battery is actually charging. Because I've definitely met some people where I'm like you are the most outgoing person I've ever met in my life and that's a lot for me.
Speaker 3:Yeah, how do you handle meeting someone who's even more outgoing or extroverted than yourself?
Speaker 2:It's not as hard as it might seem, because usually you're vibing with them and you're like let's go do something. When Jackie and I first met, it was very quick that we were off doing whatever like and not that she's more extroverted than me, but I would be more extroverted than her. So in that role it's just like you know, you end up just kind of vibing. But there are definitely times where you're like okay, you're a lot, I'm a lot, and I get it. And then but sometimes you like internalize that too, route. You're like wait, and now your feelings hurt, I love maybe I just get my feelings really easy.
Speaker 1:I'm sensitive. Here's a question for the introverts. So do you guys feel like you are maybe like have a harder time connecting with people, like making a true connection, so you don't like the small talk, understood, um, but when it comes to making key connections, is that something that's pretty easy for you, or do you think it's it's difficult for you to connect with a lot of people at a higher level or deeper level, or deeper level? Maybe that's a better way to put it.
Speaker 4:I think I'm more quality over quantity. I mean it goes back to that trust aspect. Um, I'm not gonna have a deep connection with a bunch of people. I will build a deep connection with those that I fully like, that I can fully trust.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I think I'm definitely the same way and I probably shouldn't admit this in my role, but it's definitely tough for me to connect with people on a deeper level. On a deeper level, that small talk thing really resonates with me because I know that's something I could work on and that's an acquired skill for sure. But you know, if I'm not on a text basis with you, then I probably don't have a good connection with you Do you feel like people have a hard time connecting with you back?
Speaker 4:I do, hands down, I do.
Speaker 3:I do and I wonder what, like, how do I improve that, particularly in my professional life? Because you go to these events and you wonder. You know, I really do want to talk to this person and be sociable in this group, but I don't know how. You know, where's the course on how to be a better talker, right, like? I know there's flashcards, like little icebreaker flashcards Matt was talking about. You know how's the weather, okay, but what's the follow up after that? I don't have the follow up card in my little blazer jacket to pull it out, peek at it, what's next? What's okay, what's next?
Speaker 1:So you know, I gravitate towards people who can naturally carry the conversation and I follow them and try to learn from them, but otherwise it's very hard for me, honestly because I do feel like that's something that I'm Matt, you can answer this too but I feel like I connect with people very easily and I think people relate to me very easily. But it might have something to do with, like what Matt said earlier about kind of adjusting your social, you know, depending on the person, depending on the environment, where you kind of make the adjustment and you can kind of manage to find a connecting point. But are you?
Speaker 4:connecting completely, or are they more superficial connections to kind of just get you through those conversations that point in time? Or do you think you're truly like deeply connecting with somebody that like you can like Stacey, that'd be on a text basis as soon as you walk out of there with I'm on a text basis with a lot of people and I love making that connection.
Speaker 1:But I think if you can connect on a, even if it's a parenting level or or something like that, where you kind of have, you're basically talking about the difference between like an acquaintance and who you would consider a friend. Right, and I would consider people friends, probably easier than you guys would consider people friends. I think that's what we're getting at. Yes, yes, so, like my, my deep connection is probably shallower than yours but, like in my, in my head, I consider that person truly a friend versus an acquaintance, but we connected. So you know if something were to happen in their life and you know like there's.
Speaker 1:There's multiple people now, especially after you know the past few months that on LinkedInin I'm not super close with them necessarily, but maybe we've connected on something at an event. At one point they get laid off. I'm one of those people that they message and then we go back and forth and then we get on a zoom call together and then you know we actually are. I would consider them a friend now, um, where you know, even if you did that, you know at an intro, as an introvert, even if you did that much with somebody, if you even got to that point, which who knows. But would you consider that an acquaintance?
Speaker 4:yeah, because I'm thinking like unless they're gonna help me hide the body that's a front like that's a high bar yikes.
Speaker 3:That's a really good point. So introverts and extroverts have different ways that they evaluate what level of connection they have with people.
Speaker 1:I never thought, well, just I don't mean either, but just hearing you guys talk um and and then hearing matt talk it just kind of made me think about that.
Speaker 2:Like maybe that has a is an element to extroversion or introversion when I love the small talk, like those little bits that you get from people that have nothing to do with anything which is like, oh, that's kind of a cool fact about that person. And then you kind of move on, you're like, and then you remember like three weeks later like who was the pitcher for the reds in 85?
Speaker 2:you're like, oh, I know who to call for that at that one time, but like that's kind of a, if you don't have those little small conversations, um, I feel like you wouldn't have the that like. Like I love being someone who's like. I've got a guy like yeah in every instance I've got a guy or a gal or whatever, but like that's the. That's what was the old saying growing up of. Like you've got that person that you call you're like. I don't know what I need, but here's my problem who do I call?
Speaker 2:and you're like, oh yeah, of course you just call so-and-so uh, but that's why I picked jackie right. Well, that's the thing. Like you find that friend who's like okay, they, they know everybody and so yeah, and that's the extrovert, and that's like an introvert keeps one in their pocket because they're like, I might need this later you're mine this is.
Speaker 3:This is strategy. We thought introverts, us introverts thought really deep about this. We focused on who to bring into our circle that was going to expand our circle with us without us having to compromise our space, our space and our safety in those social situations.
Speaker 1:Oh, this just got really deep yeah, we just realized, oh, because like that's what we did in those definitions um that we read earlier about introverts and extroverts. Um, an introvert, one of the qualities was being guarded right, and I can totally see that with the people around this table, like there are definitely two of us who are more guarded than the other two.
Speaker 2:Yes, yes, guilty well, something I was thinking while we were talking about friends versus acquaintances that if I think back to people that I would consider introverted versus extroverted, when you're out and about, if I see somebody that I've met before, I'm always going to wave and say hi and be like oh, so you know where an introvert my assumption is and this is where I'm curious would see that person be like oh, that person was there and keep walking.
Speaker 1:Okay, I do that on airplanes all the time. I don't even listen to music or anything because I want to work. I can't listen to music and work. I'll just put the earbuds in so no one talks to me.
Speaker 3:That's what they think that I'm listening. You got a little introvert in you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, there she is, it's there popped up when she needs her naps. Yeah, so I just sleep like I was gonna ask, because I think an introvert's nightmare and even mine, quite frankly is when someone I don't know sits next to me on the plane and starts talking to me and then we're getting into conversation when I wanted to work or I wanted to relax or I wanted to just watch a movie, um, but do you, do you talk to people that you don't know like? Are you the person that starts up the conversation?
Speaker 2:not usually, because because I and this is has nothing to do with introvert I get motion sick. So falling asleep for me is like that's my defense against it, is like if I sleep through this flight I'm not going to get sick, um, and like if you take Dramamine it's going to put you to sleep anyway. So, but I mean, I've definitely had the like, if I see someone who's doing something or if, like I've like I've been even seeing somebody who's like reading a book that I just read and I'm like, oh my god, how's that? Like I will do that, yeah, 100. But the second it's like the plane is moving, there's no more talking, um, and as soon as we land we'll talk. I'll talk again, like once we're taxiing. You know you've made a new friend and like, what can you learn about the city you're getting into?
Speaker 1:do you talk to your uber driver? Oh yeah do you start? You start the conversation with your uber driver.
Speaker 2:Usually you can tell if they want to, and in chicago a lot of times they're on the phone anyway, so you don't. But I've definitely like I'll usually let them start the conversation because I'm like they've been driving sometimes for, you know, eight hours right they may want to talk or they may be like just their social battery's dead like they're just dead and so, like you try to, you're kind of cognizant of that and that goes back. I also sleep in capsules yeah, exactly the emotions think I just fall asleep.
Speaker 4:I've always been someone like if I'm in movement, in a vehicle of sorts, I will be sleeping okay, I've got a question because, like, you're talking about starting conversations with uber drivers or someone that read a book I don't know about you, stacy but like, if I'm with someone that is an extrovert like that and will randomly start talking to someone completely random, I almost get embarrassed. Yeah, yeah, like my dad does this. My dad does exactly what you did. Like he will just randomly start talking to people because of whatever, like oh, great shirt, or we had yeah, oh, and you know, whatever it is, there's always someone like that just stop, just stop, just quit.
Speaker 4:Talking to them like this is embarrassing.
Speaker 2:You don't know them like I will and then he would consider them a good friend, a stranger is just a friend you haven't made yet.
Speaker 1:That's a good one.
Speaker 2:My grandpa's always done that, like I remember growing up like we could be across the country, and grandpa will genuinely know somebody in the airport and you're like, when did you have an opportunity? And I'm a pretty extroverted person, and even I well, as I'm getting older, it's fair that I usually see someone in an airport that I know.
Speaker 2:But I also travel a lot, so I'm in airports a lot, but I'm also like, if you think about traveling, I'm curious about this. I'm on a business trip. It's me traveling for work or for whatever. I'm going to the hotel bar, I'm going to eat at the bar, I'm going to talk with all of the other people at the bar and the bartender. Are you more likely to like either go sit at a table by yourself or order into your room versus actually going down? Because, like the idea of sitting at a table and eating a meal alone at a restaurant is awful, I would rather just not eat.
Speaker 1:I used to be that way.
Speaker 4:But I don't mind. It doesn't bother me at all. Me neither. I actually love just having a dinner by myself. It comes with practice. I used to be like you.
Speaker 2:I love sitting in the bar because then you can talk even if you're not drinking, like you're talking to the bartender and it's like sometimes they want to talk and sometimes they don't, and you can usually get that pretty quick. But I've definitely been sitting there too where I've started.
Speaker 1:You know, you just start talking and hopefully people chime in just hacking away at their computer and they're just looking at you like you could be quiet now.
Speaker 2:It's usually megan moody oh, that's me, but I'm part of me is like okay, then you can go sit at the table no, no, this is so funny.
Speaker 3:I'll tell you this. I'll tell you the story because it talks a little bit earlier about okay, how can I be a little bit less introverted? I'm a little bit embarrassed by this. How can I be better at my job? So lately I've been trying to go out of my comfort zone and do things like Matt would do. I would normally like Megan sit at a table by myself or do room service, do my work, you know, turn in for the night. I'm not there to talk to anybody. Recently I was in Toronto at the AAA Canada conference and I thought, hey, instead of going to the airport I'm sorry, the hotel restaurant I'm going to go discover a place and I'm going to sit at the bar and I'm just going to enjoy it and maybe I'll get some networking in there. Shame on me. Shame on me Because I went to the bar as my little introverted self. I ordered my food and I was like excited because, like I talked to the bartender, for two minutes.
Speaker 3:I was like because, like, I talked to the bartender for two minutes, I was like this is progress. And there were only two other people at the bar and I was just keeping to myself and eventually a girl sitting next to me started engaging in conversation with me and we're talking for like 30 minutes and it's going really, really, really good. I'm like, oh my God, I can do this. I'm legitimately an extrovert. I just met a lawyer. I'm networking. I'm legitimately an extrovert. I just met a lawyer. I'm networking, I'm meeting new people, I'm learning things, you know. And the night goes on and on and on and turns out she's like the town drunk, she just gets drunker and drunker and you know it's all in good fun. But I just like didn't meet the right person that night and she was way too extroverted for me to the point where I had to like excuse myself and get an Uber and go.
Speaker 3:But I was proud of myself for strafing those lines and trying to pass my boundaries, because you never know who you meet. I'm always jealous of the people who do strike up conversations when they're in the line at the grocery store or they're on a plane, because the people that I talk to that, take those risks. They often meet super interesting people like, oh, I surgeon, a surgeon in germany, and um, he invited me to stay the next time I went there. Things like that. I'm like okay, you learn from people, you make friends and you never know who you might meet. So sometimes it is beneficial to talk to people, like if you have the propensity to do that. So like taking that, applying that to your work life, applying that to your personal life, like it could benefit both of those things I'm proud of you.
Speaker 1:I'm proud of you.
Speaker 2:That's very nice and I've tried to do the opposite, like there's been times where I'm like, okay, I need to be okay with like, actually like with eating by myself. I'm still not, don't get me wrong and I've definitely gone to the restaurant like I'm gonna sit here and I'm gonna eat by myself, and then it's not 10 minutes. I'm like I hope the waiter didn't have other tables because they're talking to me now.
Speaker 2:I failed miserably, um, but in the opposite direction, because sometimes you're like, okay, I need to be okay with this. I cannot be like because it seems it would seem on the outside like an extrovert should be able to walk into any restaurant and do you know? But the idea of sitting at the table by yourself and not talking to the other people and you're looking around and you're like one is the loneliest number.
Speaker 2:Like and you guys are like this is great. I'm enjoying my meal, I'm thinking through my day and I'm like this is awful, like I can't even taste my food. I need another cocktail.
Speaker 5:And then all of a sudden you leave and you're like, oh, that introvert thought that I was the town drunk. Hi, I'm Ted Hughes, Executive Director of AWDA and Senior Director of Community Engagement for the Auto Care Association. We provide our members with numerous avenues for connection and collaboration through our diverse range of committees and communities. Whether you're interested in advancing your career through the Women in Auto Care program or our vibrant Under 40 group, or simply wish to network and glean insights from fellow distributors, shops and manufacturers, we have dedicated committees and communities eager to connect with you. Learn more at autocareorg slash communities.
Speaker 1:Like okay, if there's an introvert in the office who's never part of the conversations, never includes themselves, never introvert, right right, but like never comes to lunch, all that kind of stuff. I think it's worth having that conversation with that person and just saying like do you not want to come, because that's totally okay, or do you want to because you can come with me, you can ride with me, you know, or whatever, and like extend the hand, you know, I just I think it's worth having that line of communication at least once to understand that person and understand where they're coming from and making sure that you're not missing a cue as their manager or even as their colleague, really, that you should be inviting them, just because they don't make the decision themselves, to kind of include themselves.
Speaker 2:But then, as the extrovert too, I'm thinking through this right, and something you said was well, you can ride with me as an extrovert. That sounds lovely. Right as an extrovert they're like I'm going to charge on my way to the restaurant I want to drive myself. We are going to eat and I'm going to charge on my way back to the office.
Speaker 5:I don't want to be riding with you.
Speaker 2:It could be. As an extrovert you're like is my car dirty? Does it like what?
Speaker 3:Do I smell?
Speaker 2:Yeah, I did DO today. But like that's something to think about. Of like say, hey, you know I'll drive myself for X, Y, Z reason and it's. It's interesting, I don't know. It just popped in my head of like that would be my first thought, Maybe often, like that seemed like in my head. As an extrovert, it seems ridiculous to ever ride in a car by yourself. Everyone's going like I was the first one on those uber shares. No, you're like you've got two different people and they pass it on. I'm like let's try this. I didn't do it very often because usually it's people that it's not the people you want to be talking to but, I definitely tried it out instantaneously it is a nightmare, it's a defense mechanism, because I find myself doing that right.
Speaker 2:Or in the first wave of 30 people if there's 35.
Speaker 4:That's exactly what I started thinking when you said that I'm like, okay, introverts versus extroverts at a, let's say, three-hour event. Do you say goodbye, stacey, to a bunch of people before you leave, or do you just bow?
Speaker 3:out. It depends, okay, most of and introverts will do that and don't take it personally. Sometimes they will bow out. What is it called An Irish goodbye?
Speaker 1:Yeah, I do that all the time.
Speaker 3:You do it oh yeah, okay, say goodbye to who is important.
Speaker 2:Yeah, really, but you're doing it at the very end, you're not doing it. Oh yeah, funny. I'm very rarely leaving in the in the beginning.
Speaker 1:I really wonder if, at the end of these networking events, if it's just the extroverts left and that's why it gets so fun yes, I will give you that, that's 100 true well, that's the the like think of connect right.
Speaker 2:Like we have a. We have a cocktail reception that ends at 11 pm every night and I'm there right up until the end. Stacey and I are already in bed by that point, right. But then the next morning you guys are like breakfast. You've got your and I'm like I need a gallon of energy drink. But I'm going to make it two kind of breakfast.
Speaker 3:Yeah, you made the last five minutes of breakfast.
Speaker 2:That counts. That's pretty much where my and I it's just interesting to think about of and I don't that could just be a me thing. Well, if you actually were decided like yeah, there's still people like let's keep going, and then realizing, well, shoot, I have another day to do so I should probably like there's, there's your social battery, but then you should like you're genuine, like you should get six to eight there's also also adulting.
Speaker 2:There's adulting and it's a hard line to dance sometimes because I especially think of sales. Right, that's my job. My job is to talk to people and find out what challenges are, and half the time I can't fix them, but I can point them in the direction and that's part of building everything up right and that's why being an extrovert makes me better at my job. But on the flip side, there's things I've had, I've known some introverted salespeople, but they they can go out, they can do the thing, as long as they have time to recharge and they have their own strengths and like, yeah, they may not have the guy for everything, but they can deep think on this problem. And being like let's, let's pull all of these things together, let's whiteboard this out, like let's da-da-da-da-da. And then you come in and you're like oh yeah, I was just going to have Sean do it.
Speaker 1:You know, when I was younger I wouldn't understand why anybody would want to not close out the event. I would have even looked at it like my company's paying me to be here. So I need to take full advantage and maximize this. And even to this day that's kind of a little bit how I feel. But I don't look down on people who go to bed.
Speaker 1:I actually look up to them a little bit, like they like well you are all right maybe we get a gold star, because I'm like you know, you guys, it just feels kind of like mature that you're like, no, I'm gonna go, I don't mind not having fomo, but you know, this is what I need. I need the sleep. Whatever, I don't usually need the sleep because I'm completely charged. I swear like being social, like that, gives me so much energy that, like I can, I can stay at the event until 11 at night and then get up at 6 am and be the first one to breakfast the next day, and I can do that maybe three or four days in a row and I'm OK.
Speaker 4:Yeah, you still are always like the first one at breakfast and I know, like you were out late, like you'd be out staying at these things longer than I would be the night before, know, like you were out late, like you'd be out staying at these things longer than I would be the night before.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I can appreciate that. I mean, we work together now, and now we know exactly what our personalities are. So when I'm in bed at 10 o'clock, I know Jackie's holding down the fort until midnight, but she's still going to get up and do her responsibilities right. So I understand that part about you, you understand that part about me, and then we're both bringing our best and contributing in our own unique way, absolutely.
Speaker 2:I wish I were a morning person.
Speaker 1:I was up this morning, like even this morning boys trip every year.
Speaker 2:where 15 of us go, we get a big house Like it's a blast. Is that something like when you hear that? Are you like I would rather chop off my left foot than go and stay in a house with 15 people?
Speaker 3:That sounds fun. We were literally just talking about this today and I think it goes back to who do we trust? And we also said maximum two nights do we trust?
Speaker 3:And we also said maximum two nights. I want to drive myself. Yes, Introverts set boundaries Right and like this is so I love this question. I love this question. It's it's a very calculated decision that we have to make. So who is going to be there? Can I tolerate this person? How long is there an escape plan? What if something goes south? I don't want to damage my reputation with this person, right Like. This applies in personal and professional. I'm I'm very wary of who I spend my time with, because I want to make sure that it's it's productive and that everybody's happy. And we talked about being people pleasers. If you're an extrovert, like introverts are not people pleasers. So if there's something going on in a situation with people, no matter where, that might be like being uncomfortable and we want to be able to remove ourselves. So it takes a lot of thought and a lot of trust.
Speaker 1:This was a huge aha moment for me just now, because my husband and I argue about this a lot. So he's an introvert and when you know a lot of times like I have groups of friends that want to do like a couple's trip or something like that, and if there's even one person that they he just can't tolerate or something like that, he just won't want to go, I'll be like just ignore that person. What do you like? Why are you letting that dictate?
Speaker 4:about them being there.
Speaker 3:That is, it depletes your battery so much quicker than any other norm like any other human, or that you can't be yourself in a situation, right like if you're going out um to to a vacation, if you're going out to a dinner, that's a work dinner and you want to know who's on the roster, if there's someone there that maybe you're you're not totally into it, it changes the way that you act in that situation and react, and that, I think, for introverts, is a problem to say do you think that's because, like to me, that's not true?
Speaker 1:Like for an extrovert, because if there's somebody who I don't get a good vibe from, or something like that, I can just still have a great time Talk to the other people that I do get good vibes from, and totally have a great time vibes from, and totally have a great time, and it doesn't affect me whatsoever yeah, and I and I just never knew that about, imagine it's a.
Speaker 2:It's a nightmare for you guys yeah, because if you're given like overthinkers, like. Like. For me it's like oh yeah, just bring so and so, like whomever. And then you show up and you're like this was not the list I was given yeah, and I'm like awesome new friends and you guys are like this was not the list.
Speaker 3:Yes, that was the other thing I read.
Speaker 2:I will pick every one I'll be like on the way in. I'm like did y'all want to just sit with us?
Speaker 4:Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2:I didn't think about it until just now, Like how miserable that must be for an introvert. Yes, and not the list.
Speaker 4:Because you don't have the facts, you don't know the details, you didn't have time to plan, to playing this out, that's where you get to meet them all.
Speaker 2:Oh, new facts, best friends.
Speaker 3:The internet said that introverts ask what if and extroverts ask what is.
Speaker 1:Wait, you gotta say that again.
Speaker 3:Introverts ask what if we want to know what all the circumstances are? Who's going to be there? What's going to occur? What's the schedule?
Speaker 1:What's the structure? Like all of the possibilities and all of the situations in your head and extroverts just ask what is, what is it?
Speaker 3:I'm gonna dive right in that's the difference.
Speaker 1:I can totally see that. Yeah, we kind of like deal with it whatever it is.
Speaker 2:We just, we'll adapt, we'll roll with the punches and like get moving yeah, fly, and you guys are a little bit more.
Speaker 1:You know you want your trusted circle because what could?
Speaker 2:happen, calculated that I need to know. Interesting.
Speaker 1:I could see that. So how does that play out in a professional world?
Speaker 4:I think this is where you have your major learning, growing, adapting as you go through your career. I mean, as Stacey said, her and I are both in roles that require extroverts and extrovert personalities, and you know, having these bigger discussions, following up on emails, being on stage, and you have to, just like extroverts, have to learn how to, when to turn it down when it's appropriate. You know we also have to learn and grow and adapt and I think you, you know, if you care enough, you get better with that as you go through your career and then you have your little time inside of it and then you have your little time inside of it.
Speaker 3:Yeah, we all professionally, we all have our own circles that we run in, people that we identify with, that we've become friends with. We ask business questions too. We learn and we grow with. I think over time those grow, but we we take more caution or more care as to when we turn things up into the more extroverted realm. It just takes us a little bit longer to get there than the extrovert and the extroverts would.
Speaker 4:Yeah, you know your comment about the list, like who's on the list and don't change the list, kind of thing. Like I especially if I don't know if it's a conference that I'm not perhaps commonly at I scope out the attendee list because I kind of look for my safe zone, whether that's at a conference or who my you know safe zone is at work, who my safe zone is in a social environment. I kind of I know that then I can gravitate towards that person if I need at least a balance to try and basically charge through that situation. And so for me, yeah, that list is really, really important and don't just disappear off that list. If you were the one that I was counting on, I didn't even think about that.
Speaker 1:That's such a huge one.
Speaker 2:I feel like I often overbook myself, like I have to be in four places today. And I remember we were getting ready to go to dinner and I remember thinking, oh, I should just go grab like 10 other people because, like, we need a big group. And I remember looking over at you and we'd ask one person. You were like, well, I guess we can just go go. And it was in that moment that I'm dreaming like, okay, yeah, the two of us is perfect, like get the cue. It's not that I and I I wonder sometimes if, like, I caught on to that right, but in your head is it a space of like, why do you need the other people, am I not? Like, do you not want to talk to me at dinner? Is that why you need 15 other people? And it's like, for me, it's just like I'm a more the merrier, like yeah we.
Speaker 2:That way, 15 different conversations can be happening at the table. Where are you? Like I, it is having a conversation with me not fulfilling enough. Is that something that you think about?
Speaker 4:I don't know that's a good question. At one point I maybe kind of thought that, but I think it kind of goes back to the growing, the learning, adapting aspect, um. But so, like it doesn't, I don't think that now, um, but yeah, early when I was younger I would say that it's like, well, I'm like can't you, and I just talk so what are your guys's biggest takeaways from today? Everyone's looking at me, so so I guess I'm going to go first.
Speaker 4:So for me, I think it's the fact that we don't always know whether people are actually introverts or extroverts, even with our best guesses, because I've got to keep going back. Matt, you brought it up first. It's how you recharge your battery.
Speaker 1:What about you, Matt?
Speaker 2:I think for mine it's constantly being perceptive of. You know, people aren't usually out to be mean, blunt isn't mean, um, and it's something that you have to learn, uh, over time, and I think that throughout all of this that was something that kept coming back, was like it's really easy to internalize when an introvert needs that moment to themselves and as an extrovert, I don't and done this to you Honestly, don't answer that, but when I invite somebody to dinner and without checking with them first.
Speaker 1:Other people are looking for dinner buddies, and I want them to feel included too, so I invite you know, I end up inviting three more people who weren't on Megan's list, who knows? So I think that that's something that I need to be aware of. That could be a little triggering for introverts. You know that they have this list in their head and for me to just go against it without checking with them, and my biggest takeaway is that being an introvert is not an automatic write-off, which is good.
Speaker 3:Hiring introverts is probably a really positive thing in the workplace, but, more importantly, the balance of introverts and extroverts in the workplace. It sounds like a lot of us feel more balanced when we have one of each other to work with, so that's a takeaway both personally and professionally for me.
Speaker 1:Love that Good one. Okay, so let's do takeaways. Introverts what is something that you learned about extroverts? And then extroverts what is something that you learned today about introverts?
Speaker 4:oh, for me it was the feelings I did not think it would like.
Speaker 2:It was easy to hurt your feelings surprise maybe, but maybe at your level, but I I totally see that point of of how it can be interpreted by us just saying I need to bow out, like I like you, but goodbye I think mine is, um, right up to the end of what we were talking about was the when you come with a completed idea, being careful about challenging it because you've put so much energy that that collaboration in my head seems like, oh, this is the natural next step, like let's flesh this out, and you're like I already did that, and being careful about not diving in too deep and not thinking about it first. But knowing that you've put so much thought into it because it's not the way that I would have done it, and knowing that you guys come with a full thought and come with it all kind of done, is something that I hadn't realized and kind of thought through.
Speaker 3:When I'm in a collaborative environment or when I'm challenging things, doing it in a way that's a bit more sensitive, if that makes sense if that makes sense, and as an introvert, my biggest takeaway from the extroverts today was that having more extroverts in my circle can compliment me. So in areas where I'm more uncomfortable I could lean on my extroverted contacts or friends in the industry to help me expand my network, to help get me out of my comfort zone, to do more things, but not overextend myself, but be an extension of me through our connections. Yeah, that's a good one.
Speaker 1:I think mine was around when we talked about how I might consider a friend a friend before an introvert might, and I think that that actually is a bit of an aha moment for me when it comes to people that really look at quality over quantity, more of like an introvert, birded way of looking at it versus you know, the more the merrier. So I would quickly consider somebody one of my friends without having to test that first.
Speaker 3:Trust no one, just kidding, be weird.
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Description
Can understanding your social style improve your work and personal life? Find out as we explore the interaction between introverts and extroverts. Jacki Lutz with co-host, Stacey Miller, share their experiences navigating the middle ground between introversion and extroversion. Our guests, Matt Fowler, an exuberant head of sales at Visual SKUs, and Meagan Moody, the introspective head of customers and strategy for ZF Aftermarket, offer insights from opposite ends of the personality spectrum. We challenge stereotypes and uncover how acknowledging these traits can foster collaboration and personal growth.
Engage in our discussion on the complexities of small talk versus meaningful conversations and how each personality type handles these social nuances. We break down the skill required to transition from superficial chit-chat to valuable interactions, especially in professional settings like networking events and conferences. Our conversation highlights common misconceptions, such as the myth that extroverts always need to be talking, and delves into the emotional impact on extroverts when their social efforts fall flat. Learn about the balance introverts seek for comfort and the multitasking tendencies that can either aid or hinder meaningful communication.
We also venture into how introversion and extroversion affect relationships, both personal and professional. From forming friendships to managing biases, we discuss the importance of mutual understanding and respect for different social energy levels. Discover how managers can better engage introverted employees and how both personality types can harmoniously contribute to a team. With anecdotes and personal stories, we emphasize the value of a balanced social dynamic. Tune in to gain a deeper understanding of yourself and those around you, and learn how to create a more inclusive and effective workplace.